kristin has been a bad kristin
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
