I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize