Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize