remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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