Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Drunk is a universal language darling
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
