Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize