Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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