If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
