the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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