i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
