You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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