It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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