rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
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