mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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