I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
