he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
My ATM looks so different sober.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
