i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize