it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
