i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
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