ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
