No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
