Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
