can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
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He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
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Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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