I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize