Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
What changed your mind?
Being sober
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
