Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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