Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
