Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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