So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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