think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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