I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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