That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
