That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
