Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
