Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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