some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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