i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize