STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Randomize