It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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