what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
They took my balls.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
