she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
