What a fucking waste of an outfit
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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