we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
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