So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize