Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
