i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
It's just like the Real World with babies
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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