I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
