playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Randomize
