Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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