and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Less talking, more tequila
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
