Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
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This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
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I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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